No I am not getting married.
I went to Lyon today to meet someone and to make some photography tests.
There is a enormous mall in front of the train station where I like to try not to get lost. It was the biggest in Europe at a time. I went to the underground of the mall where there is… a “spiritual meeting point”. It is an area that I have never seen anywhere else in France where people from any religion can spend quiet time. There are religious books and there is a small space for muslim who are too far to rush home to be able to pray.
I had much time before going back to meet my friend so she would drive us home. I had not read my scripture before leaving home early in the morning so I asked for a bible and I read.
I gave back the bible once I was done and the lady there started to ask me if I knew about their association. I did not but the talk quickly shifted to my job as a photographer because her niece studied photography and has a hard time finding any job in this field. I gave as much infos as I could and it was nice to be able to help. Then I can’t remember why I took a look at my phone and found out that while I was reading the scriptures I had gotten a call and when I called back I found out it was my stake president who asked me in a hurry to rush to Geneva because one of the seventy wants to meet with me.
I thought I did not have the money but I knew that even of the train ticket is indeed too expensive for me right now as I am typing those words I could ask my sister to lend me the money. So I got the ticket and I am going Saturday to meet with Elder Paya in Geneva.
I like the fact that this call came while I was reading the scriptures and trying to rest my soul in the rush of the mall.
I have been wondering about this lately.
I love truth. No matter what kind of truth. Something else that I like is question and I like questions better than answers. There is a stretch and a growth in questions that answers stop according to me in this world and in this life. Then when you understand that you come closer to the truth it is so hard for me to let people in their ignorance. I know I am supposed to let them follow their path at their own pace but I know that if I do things properly I can help them to go faster for one step or two. I don’t intend to save their life or to force them to see things the way I do. I have learned a long time ago that this is pointless.
Oh I bet I will figure out the solution someday and when I do I know I will be amused by how different from anything I will have expected.
On an other subject I really want to go there (not Denmark, I already have been there). I think I have a good idea that could bring out something good for them and help me too. Be ready, it is 15 minutes long.
Yes I am really back.
One of my two goals this year is to improve the quality of my Sabbath days and I found out that writing on this blog could help me focus on something more spiritual.
Today was easier than the other days but my mind is stuck on something that I did wrong. It is not about a sin at all but I hurt people in a very surprising way.
First I handled very poorly a situation. Then when I prayed about the way to make it better…it made things worse. I really felt the spirit but things went from bad to worse.
So I am stuck on this event and how to apologize a way that will really show how much I regret.
See what I believe is not about being perfect but I think that mistakes are worse than sins.
Most of the time sinning is about our personal growth when mistakes is about being a stumbling block in people’s path without involving our own morality. I see also how Satan’s has been able to push the right buttons’ in people’s heart so things would blow out of proportion. This has also been a good kick in the pants for me because I have been wondering why I’d react a certain way in some situations. It is neither good nor bad, it is just that I don’t understand why I am this way when this just does not fit with my personality. All of a sudden the light came and I am no more puzzled by this reaction that I used to have a hard time understanding. I could try to solve it but frankly this is my last concern right now because what I care more about is how to mend things. I know that I am not the only one responsible but I am the only one who can/wants to apologize.
Yeah because I have the feeling it is pointless to expect an apology from Lucifer.
Sorry I had to end this note on a sarcasm. Sarcasm helps me step back and deal with things.
On a more positive note you need to know that I have started my own business. It is really exciting. I have a blog for it that I intend to turn into a professional site as soon as I have the money for it.
So far so good. I have only two weddings coming up this summer BUT I also have appointments and I am building a rather good network. I have to go to parties for that and I hate this kind of event where the Gotha meets but it is the only way to show my face and to get some contract. The last time I went I was able to say hello to a person or two which is MUCH better than my first times. The funnier was when someone just KNEW me “oh my gosh she KNEW me”. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know me.
Those people think they are so important. And yes they are but only on the little space they occupy.